The Facts of Life

Often when things in my life start going really good I get a little, um, big headed I guess it's called.  I start to toot my own horn, and perhaps think that I am really not such a bad person after all.  

And although there is some good coming out of my life right now, like my fast and the Community Closet Cleanse, I have to admit that there is a little bit of bad coming out of my life too.

Here are a few examples.  Read them, and let your ego get boosted, because I'm sure there isn't anybody out there quite like me...

1.  I yell at my kids on occasion.  I hate to admit this one, and I really, really try hard not to, but there are days moments when I cannot take the fighting or the tardiness or the spilling of milk any longer.  And I yell.  I used to pride myself on not yelling.  Now I pray forgiveness for yelling, and hope that the kids only remember the "fun mommy" in me, not the crabby one.

2.  I cannot, cannot stand hearing somebody chew or crunch their food.  And when it is happening 3 inches from my ear it takes me no more than 3 seconds to lose my mind.  It is worse than fingernails on a chalkboard to me.  Seriously.  I swear my man searches me out right before taking a bite of chips, just to annoy me.  Love you dear.

3.  I am obsessive compulsive about walking on the treadmill or outside everyday.  I have to do it for a multitude of reasons, one of which is to keep my sanity.  Even if the kids come to bother see me every 2 minutes and 27 seconds, it is worth it.  I also enjoy the benefits of exercise, which leads me to...

4.  Desserts are non-negationable at my house.  They are required to happen after every meal.  No questions asked.

5.  Noise drives me batty.  Screaming, crying, yelling, fighting, loud chatter, all of it.  And especially when I am trying to write a post for my blog, I need silence.  No music.  No talking.  No crying.  No background noise from the tv.  Just silence.  If by some chance a child comes near me while I am trying to type, they are required to sit quietly and be self-sufficient until I am done.  This has been known to go on for hours.  I'm kidding.

6.  I cry easily.  Tears flow at my children's programs, recitals, baptisms, parent teacher conferences, open houses, first days of school, last days of school, camp drop-offs, first bike ride without training wheels, ear tube surgery, haircuts when hair is being donated, and on and on.   If my child is involved, so are my tears.  But the tears are not limited to my children's activities.  I have also been known to cry at songs, movies, good conversations, bad conversations, and on.  My eyes are comparable to leaky faucets.

7.  I am deathly afraid of dark basements at night.  I had a babysitter once lock me in the basement after she convinced us all that there were monsters down there.  That was not cool.  Not cool at all. 

8.  I am a bit of a sleep nazi when it comes to my children.  Until they are in school full-time, they nap.  For the sake of us all.  I plan my day around nap time(also non-negotiable), and I get all hot and bothered if bedtime happens even 3 minutes after the set time.  

9.  My man has informed me that I am neither a morning person, nor a night owl.  I thrive mid-day.  I am typically not productive before 7am and am dead weight after 8:30pm.  

10.  I am terrible at goodbyes.  Terrible.  Just ask anybody that I have ever had to say that word to.  I am a blubbery mess, to the point that I can't even say the word.  Trying to get through a goodbye can be down right embarrassing for all involved when I show up.

So there you have it.  You take the good, you take the bad, you take them both, and then you have the facts of life.


Please note that I always wanted to be like Blair growing up, but pry was a bit more like Natalie or Tootie by nature.  Loved.that.show.